The words “tough” and “love” don’t seem to go together, do they? But they do.
Most people view love as a caring, compassionate, tender, gentle, warm fuzzy expression of affection for another person.  I Corinthians 13:1-8 is the Christian’s guide for how to love others with God’s love. Review it when you have a few moments.  Life would be awesome if you and I loved each other and others with the love listed in the love chapter.
The word tough is not in the love chapter.  So, what is tough love all about? Does it have a place in human relationships? What about Christians and tough love? I am glad you asked.
Tough love, according to Ephesians 4:15 is speaking the truth in love.  Paul writes to the church at Ephesus and all followers of Jesus “but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects unto Him, who is the head, even Christ.”
The context of Ephesians 4:11-16 is about believers in Christ being equipped for ministry, growing up in Christ, being mature in their faith walk, and fellowshipping with their brothers and sisters in Christ in unity, under the headship of Jesus.
Truth telling, even in the body of Christ, can be tough t do!  Honestly, who really wants to speak the truth in love to people we love when their life is out of order? But if we genuinely love them with the love of Christ, we will.   
How about the Lord Jesus? Did He practice tough love? I believe He did.
When necessary, Jesus practiced tough love. He did not flinch in speaking the truth in love. He called sin sin and sinners sinners.  He invited sinners to repent of sin.  He called those who repented to follow Him in faithfulness as witnesses of the Good News.
Make no mistake about it: Jesus loved, and loves everyone. But the Savior tough loved the Pharisees. He tough loved a woman at a well. Jesus tough loved hyprocrites. He tough loved those merchandising the temple, tough loved the accusers of a woman caught in adultery, tough loved the disciples when they were out of line and tough loved Peter who denied Him.
The Lord did not shy away from conflict, controversy or confrontation. Jesus spoke the truth in love from a loving heart that cared that people like you and me would live better lives. Out of a heart of love, He called things what they were, hoping people would be saved for time and eternity.
 
Love must be tough at times because life is tough.
 Sinful behavior has to be confronted with tough love. Parents can’t be patsies when their children are rebelling. Pastors may have to “tough love” erring, wayward sheep. Spouses must confront one another with truth when lies are destroying the marriage relationship.  Brothers and sisters in Christ should share tough love with each other when appropriate so the body of Christ can remain united, pure, strong and fruitful.   
Tough love from people with tender hearts can touch hurting people in a significant, life changing way.  
What Tough Love Is Not

• Tough love is not rough love.
• Tough love is not a license to criticize and judge people.
• Tough love is not an excuse to beat somebody up emotionally.
• Tough love is not condescending or condemning of others.
• Tough love never puts people down.
• Tough love will offend some folks who don’t want to change.

What Tough Love Is

• Tough love is about sharing the truth with people we love.
• Tough love is a necessary component of healthy relationships. 
• Tough love is loving others with a straightforward, tender touch.
• Tough love confronts life issues that need addressed.
• Tough love cuts through life’s bologna!
• Tough love is an opportunity for hurting people to get real about life.
• Tough love lifts people up to a place where they can receive healing, restoration and renewal.

I was a tough, hardheaded, spiritually lost person before Jesus’ unconditional, tender, tough love overwhelmed me, and I received Him into my heart as my Lord and Savior.
Some of the people throughout my life that I respect the most are the ones who spoke the truth in love to me. Their tough love in Christ showed me they really cared, caused me to pause and take a serious look at my life, and motivated me to make positive changes with the Lord’s help.
I will always be grateful for brave, caring souls who confronted me with truth because they loved me with the love of God.
Christlike, tough love from tenderhearted Christians touches people’s hurting hearts.
Do you know someone you care about that needs a dose of tough love? If so, pray for God’s guidance on how to reach out to them. Make sure your heart is right. Let the Holy Spirit speak God’s love through you. Expect them to respond positively to your loving concern for them.
“Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins.”I Peter 4:8
A Word For Your Week: Love people enough to speak the truth in love. 

Have you ever felt broken?

One of the many things I love about the Bible is its honesty and transparency. The Word of God tells life like it is. The good, the bad and the ugly shows up repeatedly on the pages of holy scripture. I don’t know about you, but I can identify with real people with real problems who found real solutions to life’s challenges through faith in God.

The Bible is a credible record of broken people who were made whole.

Take King David for an example. During a time when David was viciously, relentlessly and mercilessly assailed and attacked by enemies, he declared “I am forgotten as a dead man out of mind. I am like a broken vessel.” Psalm 31:12. Read the context of Psalm 31 and the Psalms 4-30 and you will see why Kind David felt forgotten and broken.

I get where he was coming from.

There was a time in my life that I could agree with David “I am a broken vessel.” Five years of intense pressure, unrelenting stress due to opposition from adversaries crushed me spiritually, emotionally and physically resulting in severe reactive depression and suicidal thoughts. My heart was broken. My spirit was crushed. My confidence was shattered. My life was a mess.

I spent thirty days in the hospital seeking help to assist me to find my way back to wellness and wholeness. Then a two years process of healing, restoration and renewal from the Lord that saved my life. I thank God every day that this once “broken vessel” is no longer broken!

David declares in Psalm 34:18 “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves those crushed in spirit.” Though forgotten by men, the Lord had not forgotten David. He was near, not far from David as he battled brokenness.

Psalm 34:18 saved my life one night in the hospital. Broken, and feeling forgotten and that God was a zillion miles away, the Holy Spirit gave me Psalm 34:18, assuring me the Lord was close and would make me whole again. That night in a dark room, the saving, delivering, rescuing light of the Lord shined through the darkness of my spirit, instilling hope in the healing power of Jesus Christ!

My friends, God is always near to those who love him no matter how tough life is. Health, wellness, and wholeness is always His good, acceptable and perfect will for us.

Tips For Turning Brokenness Into Wholeness

Admit you are broken. Go ahead say it “I am broken”. Denying your brokenness will not set you on the path to wholeness. It is okay to say I am a broken vessel.

Submit your brokenness to the Lord. Release your hurt to Him. Let go of the pain that is pushing you around and holding you down. Humbly, sincerely submit yourself to God’s healing process. He knows all about your brokenness and what to do to make you whole.

Commit yourself to the healing, wholeness process. Face your heartache head on. Decide to take the healing steps the Lord directs you to take. Push through your pain. Seek the help you need from caring people God has put in your life.

Refit means do what God tells you to do in your healing process. Obedience is better than sacrifice. Whatever He tells you to do, do it! Change your thinking. Establish healthy habits of body, spirit and soul. Alter your mindset and lifestyle from “I am a broken vessel” to “I am a whole vessel in Christ”.

Transmit to other “broken vessels” how God has made you whole. Never hoard your healing. Share what the Lord has done for you with others who need what you have. Share the how to’s of the journey from brokenness to wholeness. Encourage others who are broken that they can be made whole just like you have been!

Rejoice that you are no longer a broken vessel. Give God thanks every single day for turning your brokenness into wholeness! Praise the Lord that you are healed, healthy, whole, restored and renewed in Christ! Give God glory for doing for you what you couldn’t do for yourself.

Broken spirits and hearts can be made whole through the healing power of Jesus Christ.

Jesus specializes in taking broken hearts and making them whole again. Read the Gospels (Matthew, Mark. Luke and John) where you will find the true stories of many common people who experiences wholeness through their brokenness when they looked to Jesus.

“The Spirit of the lord is upon Me because the Lord has anointed Me to bring good news to the afflicted. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives and freedom to prisoners.” Isaiah 6:1, Luke 4:18

Jesus, the Anointed One, the Messiah, the Savio binds up broken hearts. Binding them up means they don’t hurt again. Jesus took our pain of brokenness when His body (“vessel”) was broken on the Cross. His brokenness makes it possible for our broken vessels to be healed and made whole!

Good news! Broken vessels, like you, me and so many others, can be made whole!

Feeing like a broken vessel”? Surrender the pieces of your brokenness to the Lord. Trust him to heal your heart because of his great love for you.

Today, choose wholeness over brokenness.

“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” Psalm 147:3

A Word For Your Week: Turn your brokenness into wholeness through faith in Christ.